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« Post# 9 Revison | Main

April 30, 2008

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Andrew White

I apologize for not commenting on your paper sooner. Carmen, you seem to have done a lot of research on your subject. You know a lot of the information necessary to write on this subject. Your bibliography seems to be a little short but you do seem to get a lot of information from the websites and books that you did gather.
However you need a lot of help on your grammar. I do not think that you completely know what it is exactly you are conveying in your paper. Some of the time I get confused as to what it is exactly you are saying in this paper. You need to get some help with your wording as quickly as possible. I suggest the writing tutors on the first floor of Robinson A.
If you can fix up your grammar your paper will be an A for sure. I also really liked your presentation. You put a lot of work into this paper, and into your presentation. We all appreciate it.

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